Girl feeling lonely

We are the loneliest generation?

Kathleen Wesley

19/08/21

You never know what you might find at a garage sale.  

Last year before the COVID-19 pandemic escalated, I was hosting a garage sale in my local area. It was the end of the day, and I was already packing up my remaining things when Sara a potential buyer approached me about a coffee machine I had for sale. "I live alone," she stuttered, "I make three cups of coffee every morning. I drink just one cup, but I make more hoping a neighbour might stop by. But no one ever does. "Everybody is too busy these days" she muttered. I sensed a great sadness and loneliness in her voice. Since the incident, I wondered how could anyone feel lonely in such a connected world? We have technology for connecting people around the globe - the internet, Facebook, and instant messaging, yet it is getting increasingly difficult to create genuine connections. The 'I'm so busy' culture of modern life has become a paradox of excessive choice and no incentive to ever slow down. Social media can also be a problem with Facebook posts highly competitive and often a 'show off' character that cannot help but make us compare our life with others. Working from home without the ability to socialise in person and missing out on water cooler talk with co-workers has shown just how lonely we are.

The Loneliness Epidemic  

After my recent garage sale, I discovered loneliness is one of the biggest health challenges our country faces. Understanding loneliness can affect anyone at any time. There is no shame. You are not alone. Yet people rarely talk about loneliness, despite it being a very common and normal feeling. When people do talk about loneliness, it is often in negative terms and associated with shame and guilt. My first realisation was that we can only begin to help one another if we are able to understand, recognise and talk about loneliness with no judgement. After my recent garage sale, I discovered a few ways to prevent loneliness and I wanted to find ways to overcome loneliness and help others in the process. 

My Tips for tackling Loneliness: My Garage Sale Realisation  

My interaction with Sara at the garage sale taught me something crucial about easing the pain of loneliness. After helping her pack up the coffee machine, I asked her to watch my table while I carried items to the car. This made me realise asking someone else for help and being vulnerable can help form strong social connections and help mitigate loneliness. I began to wonder if other people, just like me, are experiencing the same sense of isolation and inability to connect in a real emotional way.

Utilising advancements in technology to form new friendships.  

It is clear that technology will play a core role in the future of our social connections. After my recent garage sale, I discovered new methods that include:

The power of sharing lived experiences of loneliness. 

Another way to create new connections is sharing about your experiences with loneliness. We at FriendLine encourage call takers to share their own lived experiences and we find this helps to reduce the stigma of loneliness. You will find many of our friendly call takers at FriendLine have a lived experience of loneliness and are readily able to to share their experiences with you. This can help you not feel so alone.

Connect with FriendLine

We are here to have a friendly chat and support you. Call FriendLine on (1800 4 CHATS). FriendLine is for anyone who needs to reconnect or just wants a chat.

All conversations with FriendLine are anonymous and our friendly volunteers are ready for a yarn and to share a story or two.  

We are ready for a cuppa coffee and a conversation!  

FriendLine is open 365 days a year, 7 days a week from 10.00am to 8.00pm in: 

Victoria, Queensland, New South Wales, South Australia, and Western Australia. 

As we are not a crisis mental health hotline. If you are feeling like you might need mental health support one of the following organisations might be able to help you. 

Things do get better, I promise. 

Find what you love, be patient with yourself, and recognise that going through periods of loneliness can be important to growth. Knowing that loneliness can provide an opportunity to learn can be the silver lining amidst feeling depressed and alone. Things do get better, I promise.  

By Kathleen Wesley

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